‘You know you’re an engineer when . . . ’ winners named

Barbara Lewis won bragging rights, as well as a pocket protector stocked with new pens, for her winning entry in the “You know you’re an engineer when…” contest sponsored by Sandia’s Engineering Sciences Center 1500 to help mark National Engineers Week in February.

The contest drew dozens of endings for the sentence, and Sandians voted on which they liked best.

Barbara (1342) took first place for finishing the sentence with, “…you’re lying in the hospital bed asking the nurse how the light on your finger is measuring the oxygen level (and then you hold your breath to test it).”

“It actually happened, and that’s when I realized engineers can annoy non-engineers without even trying,” says Barbara, who also received a Star Wars mug and a restaurant gift certificate as prizes.

Second place went to Jerome Cap (1557) for, “…your kids say, ‘Dad, I don’t want to know the theory, all I want is the answer.’”

The other runners-up:

• Third: Michael Shaw (1719), “…you log the time it takes to get to your building’s parking lot by weekday and the time you arrived at the Southern and Eubank intersection street light (the point where no backup has occurred yet due to the security gate authorization), then plot the data to determine the latest possible arrival at the intersection to get to the parking lot by 7:45 a.m. at the latest. However, you remove any outliers during weeks related to holiday weekends due to vacations and of course, school holidays when parents might have to take the day off. You determine the latest time to arrive at Southern and Eubank on average for Monday through Thursday is 7:15 a.m., but Fridays are as late as 7:40.”
• Fourth: Taye Esho (0422), “…you create a spreadsheet to evaluate dating prospects.”
• Fifth: Keith Kozlowski (0422), “…your spouse/significant other won’t let you dress yourself.”